Drivel Of Yore

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Sunday 14 May 2023
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The Meaning Of Liff
-------------------
UMBERLEIGH (n.)
The awful moment which follows a dorchester (q.v.) when a speaker weighs up whether to repeat an amusing remark after nobody laughed the last time. To be on the horns of an umberleigh is to wonder whether people didn't hear the remark, or whether they did hear it and just didn't think it was funny, which was why somebody coughed.


Poem Of The Day
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Further Education Sucks
(Kate)

What a terrible perversity 
Is going to university 
Full of trial and adversity 
What kind of silly loony 
Wants to go to uni 
A geek who's pale and puny 
And brain washed like a moonie 
So why not be more prudent 
And not become a student 
It's nothing but a poo cunt 
Get a life instead 
Of feeding useless rubbish into your head 
Go to bed 
Paint the town red 
Change your name to Fred 
Live in a shed 
Be dead 
But live life in elation 
Bugger education 
Seize control of a third world nation 
Get your tits out in the train station 
Don't get a B.A. 
It's gay 
Why read books all day 
When you could go out and play 
Or run around in a field pretending to be a horse and going 'neigh' 
Why fill your life with dismay 
Just for a future with a bit more pay 
When you could be out looking for your next lay 
Don't get a B.Sc. 
It's boring as can be 
Do nothing be like me 
Be free 
Sit at home watching Richard and Judy on TV 
And drinking tea 
Have a pea 
Or a pee 
Unlike education urination is free 
Practice chi 
Take e 
There are answers don't you see 
Unanswered by that Ph.D. 
Don't be silly 
Eat piccalilly 
Make a chili 
Marry a prostitute called Lily 
Wear something frilly 
On your willy 
Just get rid of those books 
Further education sucks. 


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